Utawarerumono Typo/Grammar Thread [v1.1]

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Unread postby Henduluin » February 11th, 2008, 9:20 am

Shortly after the whole Touka doll thing (poor Oboro), Touka is thinking back to her conversation with Karura about how to seduce Hakuoro.

Karura tells her "Love if something which must be taken," Should be "Love is something which must be taken,"



When Urtoriy has to give back Fumiruir, there is a line that probably has the wrong name over it:
"I won't... ever let you go again!"
It has Urtoriy's name above it, but it should probably be the mother's.
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Unread postby Cent » February 11th, 2008, 10:19 am

After Nuwangi is defeated, he gets ambushed on the road.

"Really? Then take him with! If we take his head to the rebels, we'll get a great reward!"

Should be: Then take him with us!

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Unread postby Henduluin » February 11th, 2008, 3:45 pm

Almost at the end of the game, when Mutsumi is charging the orbital canon ("Flames of Purification") to use on Kunnekamun's capitol, when the party is worried about Hakuoro before retreating, Benawi says "The Emperor's existence is unceratin." Should be "The Emperor's existence is uncertain."

*edit*

Nearing the end, when we learn about Hakuoro's past, Mizushima is telling Hakuoro (Iceman) to escape because he feels "tired". Iceman then says "Maybe... I can redeem myself?" This should probably be: "Maybe... you can redeem yourself?". Unless it is in fact Mizushima talking, but then the next sentence ("Redemption?" "That would be nice... but I'm really just scared") also said by him, wouldn't make sense.
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Unread postby Balcerzak » February 11th, 2008, 5:23 pm

Scene: Training Mode->Beginner level.
"First, the blue squares around Hakuoro when it is his turn." = Sentence Fragment.
Suggestion: "First, there are blue squares around Hakuoro when it is his turn."


Scene: Training Mode->Beginner level->Status:
"Experience proves strength gained by defeating enemies." = Awkward.
Perhaps: "Experience measures strength gained from defeating enemies."


Scene: Training Mode->Beginner level->Attributes:
Amu Kami (Fire), seems to be alternately used with Himu Kami (Fire).
Question: Was this done on purpose or by accident?


Scene: Training Mode->Beginner level->Attributes:
"If you match Elements, doing great damage is in your reach." = Awkward.
Perhaps: "If you match Elements, doing great damage is within your reach."


Scene: Training Mode->Beginner level->Attributes:
"As long as you be careful, apply it well." = Bad grammar (verb conjugation, comma splice).
Suggestion: "As long as you are careful, and apply it well."


Scene: Normal Mode->Prologue->Square:
Sopok-- "I was worried over nothing."
Eruruw-- "N... Neesan!"
Suggestion: Eruruw's "Neesan!" should be hypenated "Nee-san".
(While I can understand not hyphenating when it is Sopok-neesan, here Neesan is standalone. Also, just a few frames later you have "Nee-san!" in a similar situation.)


Scene: Normal Mode->After First Battle->Nuwangi and Eruruw:
"He's rowdy, and I'm the only who can ride it." = Missing word.
Suggestion: "He's rowdy, and I'm the only one who can ride it."

Version: Utawarerumono v1.1
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Unread postby Gamen » February 11th, 2008, 6:06 pm

After the suicide attack, when Kurou is reporting on the destruction of Yamayura, Aruruw is trying to shake Teoro awake. Aruruw asks "Why?", then "Oyaji is sleeping." "Just sleeping...", when it should be Hakuoro saying "Oyaji is sleeping."
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Unread postby Zharay » February 11th, 2008, 8:54 pm

After Urtoriy and Kamyu come back from their first visit, Hakuoro says:

"Yomoru? But, you are Kamunagi..."

There should be an "a" between "are Kamunagi"
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Unread postby Fatuous One » February 12th, 2008, 1:42 am

Scene: Some time after the events with Na Tunk, in the passage with Touka and Eruruw. Touka invites Hakuoro to go fishing.

Hakoro says: "Oh come no. You don't look convinced." Should probably be "Oh come now." or "Oh come on."

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Unread postby Fatuous One » February 12th, 2008, 8:07 am

Scene: After Urtoriy gave back Fumiruir, talking with Hakuoro.

Hakuoro thinks: "This isn't the wise, cool and collected woman I now." I believe the 'now' should be 'know'.

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Unread postby Ryuusoul » February 12th, 2008, 7:34 pm

I'll get to looking at these later... but can people start posting what level they are at when they find these mistakes in addition to everything else? It just helps me narrow down where the scene is.
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Unread postby Henduluin » February 12th, 2008, 7:40 pm

Actually Ryuusoul, if you don't mind, I think it's better to list the number next to the encyclopedia. As the number increases with each battle... I think it's a better indicator than levels, which can vary greatly depending on playstyle.
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Unread postby md » February 13th, 2008, 3:08 am

Eruruw giving the flower story:

"It would have fine, but they did not heed the warnings about Mutikapa-sama."

->
"It would have been fine"
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Unread postby Ryuusoul » February 13th, 2008, 5:47 am

Henduluin wrote:Actually Ryuusoul, if you don't mind, I think it's better to list the number next to the encyclopedia. As the number increases with each battle... I think it's a better indicator than levels, which can vary greatly depending on playstyle.


Yeah, that might be better.
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Unread postby Zharay » February 13th, 2008, 9:15 am

When Hakuoro breaks Touka's doll the sentence is broken up across three lines.

"Glue---- I know there's glue somewhere..
. here it
is!"

Edit:

Around the same time (both of these are from the same line of choices), before the trio of girls go out into the main street in Utro's room, another broken up sentence.

"Onee-sama~~ Oji-sama said he has some b
usiness with
you~~!"
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Unread postby Balcerzak » February 14th, 2008, 10:50 am

Scene: (After defeating Mutikapa)
Following the Daiymo visit and subsequent food being returned.

Teoro-- "Alright-----everyone, let's go"
Problem: Needs final punctuation.
Fix: "Alright----everyone, let's go."


Eruruw-- "Are you saying I'm a kid!?"
Hakuoro-- "Uh, no, I... no at all..."
Problem: Haukuoro's line has a word wrong.
Fix: Hakuoro--"Uh, no, I... not at all..."


Scene: (After fighting Nuwangi - Encyclopedia 4)
Oboro--"I should introduce myself... I was taken care of by Tuskur-sama."
Oboro--"If it wasn't for now, I would like to talk about many things..."
Problem: Oboro's second line is terribly awkward.
Suggestion: Oboro--"If the timing were different, I would like to talk about many things..."

Hakuoro--"I can't do that. I have to do as much as I can now."
Hakuoro--"Well, should be enough..."
Problem: There is a word missing in Hakuoro's second line
Fix: Hakuoro--"Well, that should be enough..."

Oboro--"^Brother^ Anija, you should just rest and prepar [linebreak] e [linebreak] for the next battle.
Problem: Odd linebreaking
Fix: Fix linebreaks, (also look at furigana alignment?)

Oboro--"You saved my life and I entrust everything to you. It is natural that I call you my brother."
Problem: Inconsistent verb tenses
Fix: "and I entrust" should be "and I entrusted" or "so I entrusted".

Scene: (in the warehouse)
"But you'd need countless Aruruw's to hide that..."
Problem: Improper pluralization
Fix: Aruruws

Scene: (after the warehouse, preparing to visit neutral village)
Oboro--"Anija, I understand why you want to ask help from this place, but you don't have to do it personally, right?"
Problem: Missing word.
Fix: "you want to ask for help".

"Auruw is pointing to a column of smoke starting to fill the sky."
Problem: Misspelling.
Fix: Change Auruw to Aruruw.

Scene: (mid battle scene -- Aruruw's introduction as a unit)
Aruruw--"Oto~san's enemies... won't forgive them [linebreak]."
Problem: Period is rendered on a new line.
Fix: fix linebreak.

Scene: (immediately following battle)
Hakuoro--"In whatever case, the scale of this war just got larger."
Problem: Awkward phrasing.
Suggestion:"In any case,"

Scene: (Benawi's demotion, Kurou argues with Nuwangi)
Benawi--"Pardon my subordinates rudeness. He gets carried away like a little kid sometimes."
Problem: Possessive vs plural confusion.
Fix: Change "subordinates" to "subordinate's"

Scene: (after war plans for distraction and attacking gate)
Benawi--"I did not tend to underestimate him, but it appears I did."
Problem: Mistyped word.
Fix: "I did not intend"

Scene: (encyclopedia 8 - just after Kurou fight, and before Benawi fight)
Inkar--"Puhaa~~~! What a racket nyamo. I won't [linebreak] forgive [linebreak] those who disturb my sleep nyamo!"
Problem: Bad linebreaking.
Fix: fix linebreaks.

(encyclopedia 9 - just after Benawi fight)
Benawi--"For the sake of this country's future, for the sake of the people's happiness... let us disappear."
Inkar--"No,no nyamo..."
Problem: Inkar's line has a spacing problem.
Fix: Inkar--"No, no nyamo..."

Hakuoro--"You intend on just running away? You have a duty to see things through the end."
Problem: Missing word.
Fix: "see things through to the end."

Scene: (Hakuoro becomes Ouro, Kurou and Oboro argue about military)
Kurou--"You idiot, try and think a head a little!"
Problem: Improper word usage.
Fix: "think ahead a little!"

Scene: (preparing to receive Uritoriy envoy)
Benawi--"^Birth^ Akkun, ^Maturity^ Kobor, ^Weddings^ Hashek, ^Funerals^ Hahar----- [linebreak] [space] All of those ceremonies are done under Witsarnemitea."
Problem: Second line begins with an extra space.
Fix: Remove superfluous space.

Scene: (first meeting with Kamyu)
Hakuoro--"You said it would be trouble if you found out... did you perhaps come without telling her?"
Problem: Possible subject confusion, or missing word.
Suggestion: "if you were found out" or "if she found out"

Scene: (Yuzuha's Room, preparing for nicknames)
Kamyu--"Um... well... It is what good friends call eachother... I think..."
Problem: Missing space.
Fix: "each other"
Last edited by Balcerzak on February 14th, 2008, 11:53 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Unread postby Smobey » February 14th, 2008, 12:26 pm

The scene where Kuuya talks to his two generals just after the two smaller nations attack Kunnekamun. Hawenkwa says something about the two nations getting their "Just desserts."

It should be deserts, not desserts. No, seriously. That's the right expression. Look it up if you don't believe me.
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Unread postby Cart » February 14th, 2008, 1:35 pm

scene : Tsukur teaching Eururuw about medecine and admitting even she was no good at first and her sister was really a "demon" while teaching (beginning of the game, before the 1st battle)

Eruruw : Hahaha-- reallly?

problem : mistype

fix : Eruruw : Hahaha-- really?
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Unread postby Zwei999 » February 14th, 2008, 11:43 pm

This is compiled in sequence of event:

4. When Kuuya is explaining Witsarnmemitea she says "revolved against the creator, devoured him,..." it should be "revolted", not "revolved".

5. During the encounter of Hakurou and Karura when they call her Himukami, its subtitled ire Spirit in one case. "should be fire, not ire.

6. After defeating Orikakan, like immediately after the battle, while he is confronted by Eruruw. Eruruw asks if he's different from Rakshain. she says "... there... ferent?" It should be "... there... different?"

7. After the Oboro-Hakuro toilet incident, where urotorii makes eggs and stuff for a meal: Touka announces she has a report, but the following line states "go ahead." aka its a response to the claim of a report, however it is designated as Touka. It should be Hakuro.

8. After Kurara kidnaps Hakuro for Na Tunk, when he is asked by karura if he's still sulking. Yuzuha says "please do no be angry". it should be "not".

9. During the initial conversation between Hakuro and Kurara's brother about his (Hakoura's) group, Hakuro says "The are quite strong enough". It should be "They".

10. After the first battle after entering na tunk, Derihourai repsonds to karura;'s tatement about the weak as such: "even if say that, you're one of the Giryagina... etc." It should be something like: "Even if you say that..." or something along those lines.

11. During battle against Suwonkas after approaching close enough to initiate gate, Suwonkas says: "uhuhuhu... you think I would my skin come in contact with just anyone?" In all likely hood its suppose to be "You think I would let my skin..." etc.

12. During the scene where Urotori takes care of the baby with Eruruws's help: Eruruw says- "But She is a loving as if..." maybe better as - ""But she is loving it as if it were her own..." etc

13. In the same scene above eruruw says: "Urtoriy-sama... if she and that child keep..." probably supposed to be "if she keeps that child" or something similar.

14. In the return sequence of Fumiruir from utori to the parents, the child is referred to as both him and her. although this may be an error, it may also be correct since the use of him/he, etc. was a universal designation in the past, to refer to man, woman, and unknown.

15. When Diy and Genjimaru meet after Hawenkwa has been captured Diy says: "With your heart pounding so much, any baby could." It should be anybody, not baby.

16. During the Kuyaa vs. Hakuro battle, Kuuya says: "It only a matter of whether you stop me or I will keep going." Should be "It is".

17. After beating Kuuya, right after Diy's arrival, before Diy dispatches Genjimaru, Hakuro says: "Ah-- Oboro! Benawai!" it should be "Benawi".

18. when Genjimaru is talking to Hien, Genjimaru says: "If you assocate with that, then all that awaits...etc." it should be "associate".
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Unread postby Ciel » February 15th, 2008, 5:50 pm

Pretty late into the game, when you talk to Urto, Encyclopedia 21.

"Hakuoro:
What do you me? By that Diy person?"

Sounds weird. I think it should be "What do you mean? By that Diy person?"
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Unread postby ThunderCloud » February 15th, 2008, 7:24 pm

Since I can't post url until I get 5 posts, I had to save my post in a text file. If a mod can edit my post and paste the content of the text file, it'd be great.

skynet.sprintslash[DOT]net/rayromano/underwater.txt

Editing completed.
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Unread postby Multi » February 15th, 2008, 8:50 pm

Beginning of the game where you see Aruruw sleeping under a tree and pet her

"(Quetly... and gently...)" -> "(Quietly... and gently...)"
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